New Super Mario Bros. Wii Review

Intro
Way back in 2006 Nintendo released their first Mario platforming game on a handheld for a loooong time. It recieved extremely positive feedback, although many experienced Mario platformer players complained that the difficulty wasn't quite as high as it could have been, making it an extremely enjoyable yet very easy game that could be finished in just a few hours.
As if Nintendo had been listening to Eminem in the 3 years between when that and its sequel, New Super Mario Bros. Wii was released,  they most certainly didn't "go back to that now". The difficulty in this new game (which was the first Mario sidescrolling platformer on a home console since Super Mario World all the way back in the early 90s) is easy enough for kids to have a great time and hard enough for experienced gamers to be raised a new challenge.

NSMB Wii's sexy red boxart.

As you can see from the image in the boxart there, it also marks the return of the plumber's trusty old dino friend, Yoshi.
Controls
The game is played with the Wiimote on its side, with the 1 and 2 buttons on the right. Speaking of those buttons, the 2 button is the essential button necessary in almost every Mario game, the good ol' Jump Button. 1 represents the Dash and Action button. Holding it down while using the D-Pad to move makes Mario sweat buckets as he sprints past the goombas. Press and release it while you have a projectile-shooting ability (the Fire or Ice Flower power-ups, for example), however, and you shoot an enemy-damaging ball of ouch. The D-Pad is used to control Mario, as always.
Plot
Peach, the Mushroom Kingdom's famous ruler, celebrates her birthday at a party with some of her Toad servants, and Mario and Luigi as well, of course. Her huge, tempting birthday cake screams for you to cut and eat a slice of its sugary goodness. But suddenly, Bowser's children, the Koopalings, and Bowser Jr., spring out of the cake and capture the princess! Mario and Luigi are quick to chase them, but the Koopalings get away from them! The helpful Toads fire huge boxes of Power-Ups to help the plumbers (and the 2 brave Toads with them) out of the cannon and they scatter across the land.

The dastardly Koopalings.

Each world has a different Koopaling in it. In the end of the halfway forts you engage the world's Koopaling in a one-on-one battle on a platform. At the end of the final castle at the end of the world, however, an evil sorcerer comes on casts a spell on the room, giving the Koopaling an advantage. The effect ranges from simply making some of the floor raise to covering the room with water. In the end, as with almost every Mario game, you face off in an epic battle against the primary antagonist, Bowser.
It's a little generic seeing as basically the same thing happens in almost every Mario game, but hey, the game's fun and it more than makes up for the fairly weak plot.
Graphics
Obviously due to it being on the Wii instead of the DS like before, the graphics have been polished up and looks as good as ever. Mario and the enemies look less choppy than before, and Bowser much more detailed than before as well, but obviously that's expected. It's a huge improvement from the graphics on the DS and in my opinion Nintendo have done a mighty good job of it.
Music
Many of the songs on this game's soundtrack are remixed versions of NSMB on the DS's music, which isn't necessarily a bad thing but I would have liked to see a little more new tunes. The songs are as catchy as ever, and the "hah" effect in a lot of the songs return from the original. Many of the game's tracks are original, however, and very well composed. A great job by Nintendo on the music as ever.
Special Features and Multiplayer
As I said in the intro this game marks the return of Yoshi, a small dinosaur with a huge appetite. In a few levels (I say few, I'll get back to that later) you can hit a block and and an egg will pop out, hatching in a second or so into Yoshi. The colour of the Yoshi depends on which order it's hatched (e.g. the first egg always hatches into a green Yoshi, the second one into Pink etc). If you get hit whilst riding him you're forced off him as the little confused creature frantically runs around before calming down, usually running off a ledge while doing this. If your Yoshi dies there's almost always another block containing a Yoshi egg in the level.

Yoshi in all his green-ness.

Playing as Yoshi is very fun, but there simply aren't enough levels which feature him. There's one in each world, at most. Sometimes there isn't a Yoshi level in the whole of the world, which is a great shame seeing as it's one of the major additions to the game.
Now for multiplayer.
I've played multiplayer quite a few times with my friends, and I can honestly tell you, it can end up in some hilarious situations. Whether it's chucking your friend repeatedly in the lava when they've gone to get a drink, or taking years to get a Star Coin together, it can give you some very happy memories. Nintendo really pulled the multiplayer off in this game.
Now for Star Coins themselves.
If you're new to modern Mario games, a Star Coin is a special coin which, if you collect enough, can nab you some good stuff depending on the game. There are 3 in each level in this game. I certainly adds replay value to the game, and it feels very satisfying to nab a Star Coin you've found very hard to get.
Rating
94%
Nintendo did a brilliant job with this game, and it's a massive improvement from the DS version. Just a few more Yoshi levels and it really would have been something special.
Thanks for reading! See you later.

Music

Good music is what sounds good to our ears. Keeps us going. It's what we think about in our time of need and it gives us that burst of hope needed to get through the restrictive barrister that is life.
This is good music. This is good music. This isn't. You see, what this is, is a successful attempt at sparking hope in young girls' hearts making them think that one day they'll meet him backstage and he'll fall head over heels in love with them. Obviously this won't happen in a million years, but that one, tiny little spark in those girl's hearts suddenly erupts into a fiery inferno of obsession. They throw away the microscopically low chances of it ever happening and start living in a dreamworld of love. "Justin Bieber DOES love me. He said it himself on his Twitter. He loves his fans. And that includes me." The reality is, you fools, is that he doesn't give a shit about you. You're nothing special. You're just another of those screaming girls at his concerts. But no, you don't care about that. You still think he loves you. You still think that one day you'll be Mrs Bieber. WRONG.
And these trending topics on Twitter. Every goddamn day, there's one about him made up by his insane fans. "WE LOVE BIEBER". "BIEBER OR DIE". "BELIEBERS RULE THE WORLD". Get real, you morons. He goes on Twitter to advertise and retweet some of his fans' tweets about him to make them feel good about themselves. In 20 years time he might be a judge on America's Got Talent or some shit. But maybe you'll get yourself some common sense and realise he isn't worth obsessing over. Heck, I bet if he wasn't so "cute" he'd never have become popular.
And don't even get me started on Dirty Bieber Secrets. It's just sick.
Reality is, let's be honest, you only like him because of his looks. He's actually got a little singing talent, but unfortunately, you'd be too busy screaming over him at his concerts you'd never hear him.
This isn't one of my usual posts (I'll be back to normal soon) but I just felt that it was worth having a rant over.